My love for Peggy Olson
You must have heard of Platonic relationships. Its a non-sexual relationship between a man and a women, mostly spiritual in its outlook, where at least one of the partner is highly revered by the other and held in high esteem. One of the tell-tale couple to epitomize this theory has to be goddess Radha-Krishna. As long as I can remember they have always been worshiped together. Their bond is considered supreme, pious and pure despite the age difference and other short-comings because its strictly non-sexual and involves union of the souls (precisely the part majority of people don't understand).
Cut to 2nd decade of the 21st century, our Indian culture is still hungover by the same ideals. Female's virginity is important before marriage. Alia Bhatt once spoke of slut shaming which means it's irrespective of the class divide in our society. Mansplaining is a real phenomenon and casual sexism (fat shaming included) at work place is widespread. Item numbers objectifying women in movies does not seem to be stopping any sooner. Sunny Leone is a mainstream actress (we can't blame her its actually a slap on us as a society and now she can't prove herself as an actress nor is she humorous or witty in her interviews, she might as well get back to doing what she was doing). There is female infanticide and rape videos been sold in UP and Bihar holding the females at gun point and blackmailing them later. Its a huge unorganized pornographic market. Police knows about it and they don't interfere because they are party to it. The list goes on but how do we regular girls deal with these ? How does all these external turbulence manifest inside us? What is our coping mechanism ?
You would notice 2 kinds of girls at all times. There are the likes of Joan and Betty Draper from Madmen and then there is Peggy Olson. The ones who use their beauty and looks as a currency to negotiate their way to the top and the ones who don't want to take part in that transaction at all because there is too much of it already. Simply put there is this bunch who have to please men and the others who have to be men.
On the Indian context, girls of my age thrive on the notion of 'no touching only seeing' or Guys chase you, you don't chase them, 'Be a butterfly, attract guys but don't come too close...(much like Betty Draper I'd say). Meaning there will be hardcore breast thumping like 'Dhak dhak karne laga' but that's it nothing more than that. 'Don't touch me, don't touch me soniya'...What I am trying to say is, whether you like it or not this is 'teasing'. We Indian girls like to tease our way to pleasing men. Nothing wrong with a tease. Our contemporary 'Radha' is sexy! she likes to party, she likes to move that sexy wala body....
But when the party is over, all the coaxing is done, all the men have been thoroughly pleased and entertained and you don't feel like putting your makeup on, its time to bring out the nerdiness in you. A lot of girls are like 'Naina' from Yeh Jawani hai Deewani (although both the versions of Naina were equally sexy to me ), who are beautiful and intelligent at the same time. Yet you are noticed for looks first and then intelligence. Such stereotypes and old-school teasing is the problem. I don't see girls with the ideals of Peggy Olsen, at least not in my immediate surroundings. Everybody is either a 'Naina' or a Katrina Kaif (looks and figure only), nobody prioritizes their nerdiness before looks. Enough of pleasing men, we need more women who want to be men. And this is the thing in wanting to be men, we won't loose our femininity, in fact in it's pursuit we will become more of the women we are suppose to be. We need more Peggy Olsens in our lives and we need to make space for them because she is her own Bawse and is not depended on men (either father or husband).
Cut to 2nd decade of the 21st century, our Indian culture is still hungover by the same ideals. Female's virginity is important before marriage. Alia Bhatt once spoke of slut shaming which means it's irrespective of the class divide in our society. Mansplaining is a real phenomenon and casual sexism (fat shaming included) at work place is widespread. Item numbers objectifying women in movies does not seem to be stopping any sooner. Sunny Leone is a mainstream actress (we can't blame her its actually a slap on us as a society and now she can't prove herself as an actress nor is she humorous or witty in her interviews, she might as well get back to doing what she was doing). There is female infanticide and rape videos been sold in UP and Bihar holding the females at gun point and blackmailing them later. Its a huge unorganized pornographic market. Police knows about it and they don't interfere because they are party to it. The list goes on but how do we regular girls deal with these ? How does all these external turbulence manifest inside us? What is our coping mechanism ?
You would notice 2 kinds of girls at all times. There are the likes of Joan and Betty Draper from Madmen and then there is Peggy Olson. The ones who use their beauty and looks as a currency to negotiate their way to the top and the ones who don't want to take part in that transaction at all because there is too much of it already. Simply put there is this bunch who have to please men and the others who have to be men.
On the Indian context, girls of my age thrive on the notion of 'no touching only seeing' or Guys chase you, you don't chase them, 'Be a butterfly, attract guys but don't come too close...(much like Betty Draper I'd say). Meaning there will be hardcore breast thumping like 'Dhak dhak karne laga' but that's it nothing more than that. 'Don't touch me, don't touch me soniya'...What I am trying to say is, whether you like it or not this is 'teasing'. We Indian girls like to tease our way to pleasing men. Nothing wrong with a tease. Our contemporary 'Radha' is sexy! she likes to party, she likes to move that sexy wala body....
But when the party is over, all the coaxing is done, all the men have been thoroughly pleased and entertained and you don't feel like putting your makeup on, its time to bring out the nerdiness in you. A lot of girls are like 'Naina' from Yeh Jawani hai Deewani (although both the versions of Naina were equally sexy to me ), who are beautiful and intelligent at the same time. Yet you are noticed for looks first and then intelligence. Such stereotypes and old-school teasing is the problem. I don't see girls with the ideals of Peggy Olsen, at least not in my immediate surroundings. Everybody is either a 'Naina' or a Katrina Kaif (looks and figure only), nobody prioritizes their nerdiness before looks. Enough of pleasing men, we need more women who want to be men. And this is the thing in wanting to be men, we won't loose our femininity, in fact in it's pursuit we will become more of the women we are suppose to be. We need more Peggy Olsens in our lives and we need to make space for them because she is her own Bawse and is not depended on men (either father or husband).
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